Homebreakfast Birdseed Cookies (For People!)

Birdseed Cookies (For People!)

Posted in : breakfast, easy, food, funny, humor, recipe, snack on by : Jeanette Rueb Tags: , , , , , , , , , , ,

As someone who grew up in an Italian household eating copious amounts of pasta and baking cookies every other day of the week, I never really had much of an interest in dieting. I was vegetarian for a while, but I was also an extremely competitive and active runner at the time, and I couldn’t keep up with my calorie consumption. After that, I pretty much stuck to my family’s pescetarian diet with the occasional steak dinner and copious amounts of sweets around holiday times.

Anyway, now that I’m older and my metabolism is slowing down (and I can’t eat an entire shipping crate of Girl Scout cookies and not gain a pound), I’ve been trying to watch what I eat. Sometimes, I go a little crazy and dive headfirst into the deep end. I did that today.

I ended up with a day off and nothing to do. It was too cold to go outside and enjoy the 30 minutes of sunshine we had before the clouds assumed their normal position and blanketed the entire sky. Therefore, I decided that I was going to spend my 40-degree late spring day inside, baking stuff. Instead of eating breakfast, like a normal human being, I decided to bake cookies. Not just any cookies, though:

Seed cookies.

You know, the kind that you find in health food aisles that are 90% bird seed and 10% dates or some other equally sticky fruit? Yeah. Well, I didn’t have any dates, and I had even less of an idea of what I was doing, so I decided to wing it, and the end result were these birdseed cookies.

I’m… kind of sorry about the pun.

Okay, not really.

But anyway, considering these cookies are quite literally 90% seed (and grain and nut) and 10% other stuff, they really aren’t too bad. Now, they’re no lemon cookies or raspberry shortbreads, but they’re good for what basically amounts to the human version of a suet cake. Texture-wise, they’re exactly what you’d expect a seed cookie to be — seedy. Flavor wise, I threw some sweet things in there to make the flavor at least a little interesting. If you have dates, throw a few into the mix. They’ll give you more flavor and better binding. I just happened to be working with what I had in my cupboard (and today was the day I realized that I had an inordinate amount of seeds and grain in there; I was just missing hemp and sunflower seeds).

I have one more thing to add before we move on to the recipe (and it’s something I’m going to try to remember to do going forward): You may have noticed the recent addition of nutrition facts!

I’ve been uploading all the nutrition information from recent and popular posts into the FitBit app for all you nutrition trackers out there. You can find them under their post name and the brand Apartment Eats. I’m slowly adding the information from other blog posts into their database, so keep an eye out for my “brand”!

If you want to enter your own recipes from Apartment Eats or elsewhere, the analyzer I’ve been using to get recipe breakdowns is Happy Forks. You can copy and paste a whole recipe and break it down into serving sizes to find out the nutritional output. It’s pretty awesome. I’ll do my best to keep with it, since the information is easy enough to enter and hopefully helpful to more than just me!

Enjoy your nutrition facts and enjoy your birdseed, and don’t forget to tune in next week for something that would probably be less safe to share with the local wildlife.


1 Banana, mashed
1 cup Oatmeal
1 cup Pecans
1/4 cup Flax seeds
1/4 cup Chia seeds
1/2 cup Raisins
1 tbsp Cocoa powder
1 tsp Vanilla extract
1 tbsp Honey or maple syrup
1/2 tsp Cinnamon
1 tbsp Coconut oil, melted

Preheat your oven to 375 degrees F and line two baking sheets with parchment paper.

In a food processor, dump literally everything. All of it. The oats, the nuts, the seeds, the fruit, the spices, the sweeteners, and the oils — all of it. Dump it right in there. Mix it all up until it’s well-blended and you have a relatively uniform mixture.

Using a table spoon, scoop out the mixture and form it into little patties in your hand. The recipe should make about 16 cookies.

Bake the cookies for 10 minutes to dry them out. After that, take them out, let them cool for a couple of minutes, and enjoy as is… or drench them in melted chocolate and call it a day.

I’m doomed to find flax seeds scattered around my kitchen for the rest of forever now… This is my own doing…

Leave a Reply

%d bloggers like this: